Another night another thought

Dear Blog,
I don't understand why women are called abuses when really there are the guys who are at fault, lack training, etiquettes, give in to their hormones. So why is the women are called bad words. There are guys who seek them as entertainment. I see my self questioning on the morals and ethics that are put to us as a reason for fighting. I wish that I should not have known to be able to recover. It's the truth that hurts. As the night passes on i see myself yearning through the same. It's another night, another story, another thought, emptiness, chest pain but beshak Allah sabar karnay walon k saath hai. 

Thank you

So  it's that time of the year. While i was going through all the lists of things you can do when you are bored or trying to forget somebody. I stumbled across this idea that I could email you thanking you of all the stuff you did for, what I learnt from and all those things we did. While I am doing this I am listening to all-time favourite song 'maana k hum yaar nahi.' The storm outside with the rain droplets that are pouring in the back drop of the song brings this amazing feeling. If you ever read this means that we are officially done. I want you to listen to the song by Ayushman Khurrana.'Sath hou tumharay tum dur saay hi muskana'. :) Listening to the song brings quite a bit of memories though you know how terrible I am at remembering stuff.
Well thank you for coming into my life and making it a terrible yet wonderful place. I remember you used to write the notes, good-morning, good-night made me feel beautiful, wrote quotes and stuff. This went on for one and half year. The word was all roses and teenage romances. Well one thing I never really liked was the way you criticised on everything that i used. (DONT WORRY THIS PROJECT WILL TAKE ME SOME TIME AND I CAN rant as much as I want. Would only write some good stuff about you if this has to act as closure of us.)

4-May

Hi. How are you my cheating friend. I am mostly at peace but I am not happy today either honestly. But i am on a journey of becoming self-sufficient and healing and that's good. Its going to be okay one day i hope till then just breathe is the option here. I'll make sure that this posts reaches to him as well when we get to meet or not. I am waiting for the 28th June anxiously. Some hisab kitaab are pending now. One month is almost done.

4 pm;
As i sit in the office it becomes more and more difficult to survive. I just met my friends and still there's this ache, visited outside his office.I just hope that time gets passed and this becomes easier. Hopefully it would. Allah jee please maaf karde and sukoon day dey. Never have seen such difficult times.